On the main wall in her living room, Coquitlam photographer Amy Lee has several pictures of her, her husband and their daughter - all snapped by other people.
She likes that someone else has captured her young family "because it's amazing to see yourself through somebody's eyes, to know they love you," she said.
Lee does the same with her freelance business called The Connection We Share, which started a few years back after a friend mentioned how she writes down and photographs all of her daughter's new activities.
"And, I thought, 'That's a good idea.' Because when you're new to motherhood, you have Mommy Brain. You don't want to forget those early years. You need help remembering things."
Before Lee begins her one- to two-hour sessions, she asks her clients to pen a letter to their child, which is then read out at the place where the photo shoot happens - be it at the beach, a park or at home. "It's somewhere that has special meaning to them," she said.
The Centennial secondary graduate also asks several questions of the parent and the child during the session to grasp their "genuine expressions."
For example, for younger children, Lee may play a few games to photograph them laughing and having fun; however, she'll also pose questions to get them thinking like "If you were a Disney princess, who would you be?" or "What flavour of ice cream would you be?" or "If you had a magical power, what would you do with it?"
"Their answers are very surprising," Lee said, "and I think it sometimes takes the mothers back, too."
For teenagers, Lee probes the bond the mother and child share.
She asks the mother to point out their son or daughter's accomplishments, remarking how proud they are of them.
Then, Lee asks of the teens, "How will you feel when you're at college and away from your family?" or "If there's one wish you can grant your mom, what would it be?"
"I cry through most of the sessions," admitted Lee, the mother of a 22-month-old daughter who lost her own mother to cancer when she was 16. "I see the love they have and their closeness and how they are so full of potential."
Typically, Lee takes about 300 images during a session, of which she compiles five or six onto a ready-to-hang canvass with a centering quote from the parent's letter; a 20-page album book with 30 to 40 photos and the full letter; or a canvas collage with positive affirmations below the snapshots like "You are funny" or "Always make time for a good snuggle."
Lee hopes the finished product offers a touchstone to both the parent and the child. "You know when you come home at the end of the day from work and you're so tired and the house is a mess and you have to make dinner? All you have to do is look up at the canvas and you know what's important in your life."
Lee cited the example of a recent client whose daughter attends SFU.
They created an album together, in which the mother wrote about what it was like being a stay-at-home caregiver, what financial struggles they made and what it was like raising her child.
"So when the daughter has troubles at school, she opens the book and realizes she can do whatever she sets her mind to because her mom loves her and she has a strong support system," Lee said. "It grounds her."
Lee, who has a bachelor of arts degree in fashion design from Kwantlen University and works full-time at ICBC, said her seven years as a freelance portrait photographer - trained through night classes and workshops - has helped her to document "and celebrate the little things in life that pass so quickly," she said. "As a parent, you need to stop and take time to enjoy the successes."
