Veronica Marraffa’s two-year-old daughter Tatiana wouldn’t leave her lap when they visited Veronica's dying father in hospital. She was frightened by all the activity, the bright lights, the other three patients sharing Val Wright’s room.
But in the comfortable, homey environs of the Crossroads Inlet Centre Hospice, she rushed right up to her sleeping Papa to give him a hug.
And while Tatiana was too young to appreciate she was saying goodbye, Marraffa says the enduring memory of that tender moment fuels her family’s passion for hospice care.
On Sunday, May 7 “Team Papa” will be participating in its second Hike for Hospice. The 15th annual event raises funds for the Crossroads Hospice Society’s community care programs, including end-of-life care and helping their loved ones cope with loss.
“The stigma that is attached to hospice palliative care is associated with death and dying,” said Tereza McDermid, executive director of Crossroads Hospice. “But that’s not it at all. It’s about people living and making every moment count.”
Marraffa knew when her 67-year-old father was diagnosed with sepsis that they didn’t have many moments left. The infection spread rapidly — his liver was shutting down, his heart weakened — but saying goodbye in a busy, clinical hospital setting was difficult.
“It was just so hard to talk about memories and share stories,” said Marraffa.
So when a counsellor suggested the family consider hospice care for Papa, they didn’t hesitate. Each of Crossroads’ 10 beds are in private suites with comfortable sitting areas for visitors. Medical staff focus on quality of life through pain and symptom management.
Residents, who stay an average of 25.8 days, benefit from pet, music and arts therapy programs as well as therapeutic touch and spiritual care. Grief counselling and support are available for family members.
“Yes, the end result is people do die,” said McDermid, “but our hospice care residence is not a scary place. It’s very warm and feels like a home.”
Which is exactly how Marraffa describes Papa’s final six days.
“It was so peaceful for him to say goodbye,” she said.
In fact, as her father prepared to take his final breaths, choral music played softly on his room’s stereo system, a tribute to his time as a church choir director.
“It takes my breath away to explain how it was to be in that setting."
TAKE A HIKE
• The Hike for Hospice takes place on May 7 at Hyde rec centre (1379 Laurier St., Port Coquitlam). Registration begins at 9 a.m. The top two corporate teams, family teams and individuals that raise the most money will receive prizes provided by various corporate partners. To register online, go to www.hike4hospice.ca or call special events co-ordinator Shelly Pennington at 604-945-0606.
