With just days away until The Oprah Show goes off the air (yes I love her and, for the record, left-brainers, I do realize she's not God), I feel sad to see her show end.
Oprah Winfrey has been my constant time-to-make-dinner companion for 15 years and the only person I've ever heard say that being a good mom is the most important job in the world. Yes, I cried.
So here's the thing: Whether you love Oprah, as I do, are an uninspired cynic, like some, or a bitter book author who never got the call, haven't you marvelled at or even wondered to your analytical little self, how the heck did a black baby born to unwed teenagers and during the lynching year of 1954 Mississippi, who was sexually abused by relatives and pregnant at 14 (her baby died shortly after birth) grow up to be the person she is today? The odds - every last one of them - were against her.
And she's not alone.
Consider other survivor-thrivers, as they've been called, all with different levels of success who, despite facing insurmountable challenges and tough beginnings managed to overcome and thrive: comedian/actor comedian Billy Connelly, who was severely abused by his father; Tour de France champion Lance Armstrong, who won the famed cycling race after being diagnosed with testicular cancer; or Oscar and Grammy award winner Jennifer Hudson, whose family was murdered in a domestic dispute while at the height of her career.
Now here's the million-dollar question: How is it, then, that some people, who by all accounts had an OK upbringing chronically feel sorry for themselves, complain bitterly about sibling rivalry issues, hold grudges, think they had it harder than everyone else or still, after years of making their friends' or relatives' ears bleed, continue to grumble about their bad marriage or crappy job but unceasingly do nothing about it? The million dollar answer? It's a choice, or a series of them.
And here's the science to prove it.
After having a stroke on the left side of her brain in 1996, brain scientist Jill Bolte was only able to access her right brain hemisphere, yet incredibly found herself full of peace and love. Having lost her left brain access for a time, she came to realize she'd also lost all her emotional baggage (worry, negative judgment, obsessiveness about the past, fear of the future and lack of forgiveness). Her right hemisphere, the side that is full of joy and gratitude, the side that celebrates life, would motivate her over the course of eight years to rehabilitate.
Now, had her stroke occurred on her right side, leaving her with only the left hemisphere access, she would probably have deteriorated, not having the "cheerleader" side to motivate her rehabilitation.
Her "Stroke of Insight?" Any average Jane has the "power to choose, moment by moment, which character they want to project into the world."
And yes, while both sides of the brain do offer different gifts and skills, Dr. Bolte proved that by accessing your right brain more often, you would find "inner peace and improve the quality of life of others."
This is great information for anyone who would like to improve the quality of her life but didn't know she could. Still, it's a choice, and there will always be people who have no intention of improving because - let's be honest - they get more sympathy if they don't and it's just much easier not to.
And yes, left brainers, I got that from Oprah, too.
Tara McIntosh is a Port Moody resident who occasionally writes for The Tri-City News.
