There's a Senate vacancy available in British Columbia. It's the seat that Brian Mulroney appointee Gerry St. Germaine occupied for almost 20 years before his forced retirement, last year, at the age of 75.
In discussions I've had with the prime minister's office, officials have been vague about why they've taken so long to fill the post.
So, here's my open letter to Stephen Harper about who he should appoint.
Dear Mr. Harper,
I hope all is well.
I would like to suggest Jim Nelson for the position of senator for British Columbia.
I know on the surface it appears to be a peculiar choice. After all, Jim is a left-leaning, union-loving, tax-the-rich-touting, orange-wearing socialist.
But therein lies the beauty of the idea. The media and opposition parties constantly criticize you for appointing partisan hacks to the Red Chamber. By appointing Jim, you would disarm them of that critique and, more importantly, you would boggle their minds. Wouldn't that be fun?
And Jim's a good guy. He's honest and plays by the rules. I know that a senator doesn't need either of those skills, but I'm just saying.
Sure, it might be bad optics to appoint a senator now given the ongoing RCMP investigations into the false expense claims of senators Mike Duffy, Patrick Brazeau and Pamela Wallin. But Jim can actually help keep your naughty senators in line.
Jim was a school principal. In fact, he was vice-principal when I attended Mary Hill junior secondary in Port Coquitlam. As the school's disciplinarian, all the students feared him. You could give him that role in the Senate - no need for party whips, pesky auditors or even the Mounties. (He can still travel first class, right?)
Jim is now retired so he's used to the leisurely lifestyle. In 2012, the Senate sat for just 88 days. I think Jim could handle the workload, especially since you're going to prorogue Parliament until October.
Finally, I would appreciate it if you could do this as a personal favour to me. Jim's a tough debater and, every week, I have to counter his strong arguments for our column in The Tri-City News. If he were a senator, maybe I'd finally get a solo byline.
